LSJ Blogs: John Schneider

The “C” word never crossed my lips

Personally, I would never use that vulgarity to describe my trusty 2000 Ford Explorer. But, intrigued by the federal Cash-for-You-Know-What program, I began to get my ducks in a row.

Will the Pope stop the St. John-St. Thomas merger?

Regarding the shotgun marriage of the two East Lansing Catholic parishes — St. John (now St. John Student Center) and St. Thomas Aquinas …

Is safety measure actually safe?

Regarding MDOT’s new cable guardrail system …
We understand the value of  preventing, say, an eastbound vehicle from crossing the median and slamming into westbound traffic, but won’t the cables sling-shot the vehicle back   into eastbound traffic?
And, why not install them in the middle of medians, where the blow-back would be less hazardous?

Wal-Mart ain’t talkin’

Five days after I asked … there’s still no word from the Wal-Mart “public relations” people regarding the names of the two Eastwood Towne Center employees who exceeded their responsibilities (see my July 24 column) by preventing  a Laingsburg woman from wiring $2,800 to a Canadian crook.

Sorry, lady; I’m not the real thing

Subject of the e-mail in my box Monday morning: “Casablanca; Florida; sweet lady, pink shirt; lol.”

Eau de fish surrounds house deal

Thursday’s column about a shaky real estate deal in DeWitt drew many calls and e-mails from local real estate agents. Their verdict was unanimous: The deal smelled to high heaven.

Somebody, they said, was trying to take advantage of a woman in a desperate situation. OK. What’s next? What regulatory agency, if any, is responsible for sorting it all out. I'm waiting to hear.

Movie-meal package leaves bad taste

Use it, or lose it. That’s the message Philip Farhood got when he went out for a night on the town with a movie-meal gift card.

Farhood wrote: “We recently received a gift card for two movie tickets at a NCG theater and a voucher for several local restaurants.
“At both restaurants we tried we were told we had to spend the full amount of the voucher in one shot. There was no refund, or credit. We couldn’t even us the balance as a tip.”
What do I keep telling you folks about gift cards?

Speaking of impaired driving …

A New York Times story cites government research showing that a driver using a cell phone while at the wheel is four times as likely to cause a crash —  about the same as someone with a .08 percent blood alcohol level (legally drunk in Michigan). So why is one activity universally condemned, while the other (in Michigan, anyway) is practically a religion?

Let’s play ‘Hide the Road Hazard’

Have you driven lately on eastbound Grand River, west of Meridian Road, out by Spagnuolo’s Restaurant? If so, I hope it was in daylight. If not, I hope you have good dental insurance.

Sleeping it off isn't drunken driving

Consider this hypothetical scenario: Beverley Nettles-Nickerson, accepting the fact that she’s too blasted to drive, decides to sleep it off in her Hummer, in the parking lot of Dusty’s Tap room, a bar in Okemos.
It’s early May. It’s after dark. Maybe it’s a little chilly. The hapless former judge with a knack for digging herself deeper starts the engine of her Hummer in order to get some heat.